Ever talked to somebody who lacks decisiveness?
It’s one of the more obnoxious qualities in life. That person who answers every question with a question or a long rambling story or explanation, so long in nonsense and short in value that you wanna grab their shoulders and shake them. Or worse yet, just walk away from them.
The Almighty Prismo summed it up well: “Dude, I get out of relationships because I don’t want to have a discussion about what we’re going to have for dinner every night.”
We’ve all had that conversation at one point in our lives. Everyone agrees it’s frustrating. Nobody seems to want to fix it.
The solution is so simple.
When you ask someone why they didn’t get something done, are you really interested in their excuse?
If I tell one of my workers to do something and they fail to make it happen, their inane excuse is the least interesting thing in the world. It’s worse than boring. It’s a waste of even more of my time.
When I ask my lady if she wants to do something, the reason behind her decision is really only important a fraction of the time and she is one of the few people whose motivations interest me.
The problem is that these explanations, these stories, are usually an excuse to mitigate any potential conflict.
The solution, as promised is easy:
When someone asks you a yes or no question, do not launch into ums, uhs, stutterings, and stories.
Just say, “yes,” or “no.”
It’s enough goddammned information.
“Are you hungry?”
“Uh, well, maybe. What were you thinking?”
“Whatever you want, I don’t care. I just wanna eat.”
“Hmmm, I don’t know. Like tacos?”
“Oh, I had those at work on Tuesday and with my mom on Thursday. I’m all taco’d out.”
“Are you hungry?
“What do you want to have?”
Life simplified. Endless discussion between two people afraid to state their desire and make a choice – averted.